Saturday, July 05, 2003


Hey, as long as that crow has A-1 on it, I'll eat it. If r*ger were eating it, he'd put E-1 sauce on it! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


Boston Red Sox 10, HAHAHA
New York Y*nkees 2, HAHAHA
BRS Recap
Box Score

Look at the picture and caption on the Y*nkees site. Damon lowers his shoulder into cl*mens? Isn;t it against the rules to block a base besides Home? And kinda stupid for a pitcher to do it, as well. Plus, cl*mens being the scum-ridden fiend that he is, lowered his shoulder onto Damon. Probably shouldv'e focused on the ball r*ger. But you made up for it with your fantastic throw! HAHAHAHAHA

Speaking of that E-1, how come when a runner scores on the pitcher's error, the pitcher isn't charged with an Earned Run. Oh well, 7 Earned Runs given up by r*ger in his 5.1 IP is good enough for me!

Mendoza pitched very well, inducing 11 ground-ball outs while giving up only 3 outs in the air. He went 5 scoreless innings. The pen gave up 2 solo shots. Ortiz wins Man of the Game going 2 for 4 with 2 Homeruns and a Walk. MOTG standings:

1. Nomar - 4
2. Millar - 3
3. Nixon, Varitek - 2
5. Kapler, Mueller, Manny, Pedro, Burkett, Sanchez, Rupe, Lyon, J. Crede (CWS), E. Loiza (CWS), JD Drew (StL), B. Myers (PHI), J. Pierre (FLA) - 1

Sox two games out of first. Burkett vs. Andy "Horseface" Pettitte.

The crow I had to eat:

I thought Mendoza starting was a bad idea and I was pissed that Damon was starting.

Post #47

Top 6th:
Boston RS 6
NY Y*nks 0

Nice 3 run inning from the Sox. Right after I complain about Damon being in the lineup, he goes out, gets a 2 RBI basehit, then steals second, Posada's throw is way off (why does he have 1,000,000 more All-Star votes than Varitek?), so Damon goes for third. No-one covers third until cl*mens gets his chunky ass over there. r*ger can't handle the throw so he decides to hit Damon with his shoulders cuz he's a pussy scumbag piece of shit who is dead if I ever see him on the streets. Damon does him the courtesy of not sliding feet first, but he retaliates by knocking cl*mens off the base. Anyway, the whole thing could have been avoided. According to Tim McCarver, Posada should have been covering third. Let's get this straight, folks, Posada is a DH who is given a catchers mask every night. Anyway, Damon scored on a Chuck Knoblauch-esque throwing error. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

The maniacal laughing is back, baby!

Anyway, Mendoza has 10 gorundouts thus far to 3 fly outs.

Mueller just got nailed with a liner from Jeter that was right at him. He picked it up and nearly threw out Jeter at first. The Y*nkee suck ups in the Fox announcers booth said this: "a big missed opportunity by the Red Sox." Ummmm, Mr. McCarver, WHEN THE BALL IS SCORCHED AT YOU AND YOU'RE PLAYING IN TO PREVENT A BUNT, THESE THINGS HAPPEN! Then McCarver said "he would've gotten that on a bounce if he weren't playing so in." Well, Timmy, if Carl Yastrzemski had been sitting on top of the Green Monster in 1978 when B*cky Fucking D*nt hit his Homerun, then the Sox might've won the 78 AL East title. GOOD GOD TIM, YOU SUCK!

Mendoza with a very nice outing, indeed. 5 Innings thus far, no runs, 11 ground ball outs, 3 fly ball outs. A few clutch double play balls and a huge 1-3 groundout to end the Bottom of the 5th with the bases juiced.

r*ger just left the game. Where is r*ger? HE'S NOT ON THE FUCKING MOUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Post #46

Top 5th:
Boston RS 3
NY Y*nkees 0

2 run shot for Trot "I own cl*mens" after the scummer hit Millar on the hands with an up and in fastball. Ortiz just added one in the top of the 4th.

Next time the Sox are in New York for a 4 game summer series, I'm going, I can't stand not being there! Anyone know good places to stay near the park?

Oh, and why the fuck is Kapler sitting and Damon starting? Kapler is 10 for 20 with us with 5 extra basehits. In Damon's last 20 at-bats, he has one hit, a single yesterday! He's in a 1 for 21 slump!
In preparation for today's imminent loss to the Y*nkees, I've begun writing my reaction.

Tough loss today for the Sox as the Y*nks beat us _ to _. We really never were in this as Mendoza gave up _ in the 1st and 2nd innings. I guess the experiment of starting him is kaputt.

Post #44

Just found this NY Post article via FARK.

Basically, your typical 16 oz. ballpark "beer" costs the team or the concessions company (Aramark owns the concessions at Fenway) less than a quarter because they buy in such bulk. So let's say the cost of a brewski is $6.50 (I don't know what it is at Fenway, I'm not legal yet). That means that the people selling the beer make a profit of $6.26. The wine & spirits (booze) tax for Massachusetts is $4.05 per gallon (about 41 cents per 16 oz. cup) according to The Tax Foundation. So that reduces the profit per cup to $5.85. But somebody has to serve the beer. Let's say Fenway has about 20 beer distribution points each with an average of 3 workers per stand (counting supervisors etc.) The workers make say $7.50 an hour and the stands are manned from 2 hours before the game to 2 and a half hours after the game has begun. so Aramark spends $2,025 employing beer distributors. Plus whatever other overheads there are (cups, equipment, maintenance et cetera). so let's say Aramark spends $2,250 on the distribution of beer. That means Aramark begins profiting at beer #385. That is probably purchased before Sox BP comes to an end 90 minutes before game time. So when you show up at 6:45 and buy a Coors Light, you're giving Coors a quarter, Massachusetts gets 40 cents, and Aramark gets the rest. Let's say they sell 50,000 beers after making a profit. (That's 3 beers for every other person, taking into account kids, people who don't drink, and people who drink ALOT). That'd be $292,500 profit. That's almost David Ortiz's entire yearly salary in a night of beer. With 81 home games, the profit total for a year amounts to $23.7 million dollars of profit. That is a shitload of money. I don't know what Aramark's deal with the Red Sox is, but I'm sure the Red Sox get a percentage of that profit.

$23.7 million: that is the reason why beer sales will never be banned in ballparks.

Also, this post is proof that I need a job/life/hobby/girlfriend.

Post #43

Except Arsenal FC, of course!

We really conquered the Stadium today. Anyone who saw or listened to the game could hear the chants and see the fans. (TV only) It was awsome hearing "Let's Go Red Sox" then "Y*nkees Suck" and then "Fuck the Y*nkees" in the Bronx. Goddamnit I wish I was there! Oh, well.

Boston Red Sox 10
New York Englishman 3
ESPN Recap
BRS Recap
Box Score

Back in the 19th century, to celebrate the 4th of July, townspeople would challenge the King of England to a fight and call him a skunk. After some drinking, they'd insult people and call them Englishmen. At the end of the post, I'll challenge the Queen and list some reasons why England sucks.

How come when I go down to the Bronx, we lose horribly? I shouldv'e bought tickets to this series, I think it'll be a good one.

Because this game was on the Fourth, I'm gonna try to use all the horrible July 4th puns I can think of. Boston pops New York. We knocked the ball around the Stadium like a cannon ball launched from Dorchester Heights on to the British garisson occupying the great city of Boston. I haven't seen somebody in New York knocked out like that since George Washington knocked out General Cornwalis. Okay, enough!

The Man of the Game was an easy pick. Varitek won this in a land slide. You go 4 for 5 with 2 HRs and your practically a shoe in. Honorble Mentions go to "Big" Billy Mueller, and David "Da Crushah" Ortiz for their double homerun days. Tek's were early, and he added a double to his hit parade which is why he won it. D-Lowe also gets an honorable mention for his Quality Start. I'm wicked happy we had a sinker-baller pitching, the ball was flying out of the park. Here are the MOTG standings:

1. Nomar - 4
2. Millar - 3
3. Nixon, Varitek - 2
5. Kapler, Mueller, Manny, Pedro, Burkett, Sanchez, Rupe, Lyon, J. Crede (CWS), E. Loiza (CWS), JD Drew (StL), B. Myers (PHI), J. Pierre (FLA) - 1

Jays lost 5-8 to the O's, A's lost 0-1 to Anaheim.

Really pointless and gratuitous article about Curtis Pride joining the Y*nkees. I think the Y*nkee fans at ESPN (there are quite a few) wanted something positive to write about the Y*nkees. Fucking scum that they are.

Mendoza vs. cl*m*ns today at 1:20 on Fox. Be prepared Soxers, the Fox broadcasters (Joe Buck, Tim McCarver) are notorious Y*nkee ass-kissers. And also be prepared for endless pregame bullshit.

If you're gonna bet on tonight's Pepsi 400 in Daytona, put your money on Dale Earnhardt Jr. He won last night's Busch Series race last night at Daytona and led for all 250 miles.

Here is why England sucks:

1. David Beckham - this is the captain of England's national soccer team. He's the most popular athlete in the world right now. He's the Derek Jeter of soccer, which means he sucks. All he can do is make good free kicks, which would be the equivalent of a really good pinch-hitter in baseball or a good foul-shooter in basketball, or a 3rd Down running back in football.

2. the monarchy - Why the fuck do these people still exist? They have NO power, yet they inherit vast fortunes simply because their inbred parents somehow got aroused by each other's buck teeth and they had a kid. For some reason, Princess Dianna was praised for her "work." What work? If she really wanted to solve the world's problems, why not give all your money to some starving African countries? Oh, but she did so much for banning land mines. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

3. crappy English TV - Most English TV shows are horribly boring. And how come every good English show only has like 6 episodes? I have every episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus on DVD and each season is literally 6 episodes. That's a season? American TV seasons usually last for half of a year which means they are around 25 episodes in length.

4. English pacifists - not all Englanders are so-called pacifists, but some are. Thier country was literally built on imperialism and war ever since it was conquered by the Normans in 1066. So enjoy the war!

5. Manchester United - a.k.a. Manure. I hate these scum and their fans. The fact of the matter is that most Manchester fans have never even been to Manchester, or Leicester County. Man U are the New York Y*nkees of the English League. They buy up all the talent and use their influence in the FA to get their way and win trophies.

I still love England though. I'll fight the Queen in a neutral location: Greenland. She's a skank.

Post #42

Thursday, July 03, 2003

Just read an e-mail from El Guapo's Ghost. It's good getting e-mail from beyond the grave. He agrees with me about what Kim's roll should be. So I got that goin for me.

Post #41

Comcast finally fixed the broad brand routers or some shit in my neighborhood so the Red Sox Revolution will be broadcast over the internet.

Boston RS 5
TB Devil Rays 6 / 10 Innings

Well thank God Kim is the closer cuz that really helped us out tonight. I'm telling you, making Kim your typical closer isn't gonna solve the problems in the bullpen. Here are a few things that might:

1. Trades/Free Agents: Picking up guys like Todd Jones, Armando Benitez, and Tom Gordon would really help alot.

2. Healthy Players: If Fox and Fossum can contribute, that would really help us. Fossum's left-handedness could really come in handy, as could his ability to go long in a game.

3. STEP IT UP: If the guys already in the pen can kick it up a notch, then we'll be in great shape,

4. Make Kim a bullpen utility man: Why make Kim just a closer? Why only use him for save situations in the 9th? He is far and away the best pitcher out there, so why not use him as often as possible? Like tonight, for instance. Why not bring him in to finish up the 7th for Wakefield and close out the game? More on this later in the post.

Tonight's Man of the Game is Manny Ramirez. He had 2 HRs. The first one gave the Sox a 1-0 lead in the 2nd and his second tied the game in the 5th with 2 outs. Unfortunately, his effort was in vain. Yesterday's MOTG is Pedro. He went 7 without giving up an Earned Run and K'ed 7. Here are the MOTG standings:

1. Nomar - 4
2. Millar - 3
3. Nixon - 2
4. Kapler, Mueller, Manny, Pedro, Burkett, Sanchez, Rupe, Lyon, J. Crede (CWS), E. Loiza (CWS), JD Drew (StL), B. Myers (PHI), J. Pierre (FLA) - 1

And now for the not-so coveted Bitch-Goat distribution. Millar and Mirabelli each contributed nothing to the offense so they will get 0.1 each. Lyon and Timlin each pitched shittily so they will each receive 0.4 points. Here are the Bitch-Goat standings:

1. Lyon - 1.0
2. Manny - 0.8
3. Timlin - 0.5
4. Rupe - 0.4
5. Grady, Varitek, Millar - 0.2
8. Walker, Nomar, Mueller, Seanez, Shiell - 0.1

Disclaimer: Keep in mind this is a relatively new thing so the numbers reflect only a short period of Bitch-Goats.

ESPN's Phil Rogers has projected the AL and NL All-Star teams. Jayson Stark, who I can't stand by the by, wrote this on the upcoming All-Star Game and the team selection.

Here's the story about Todd Jones' signing with the Sox.

Remember Y*nkee "prospect" Drew Henson? He was supposed to replace Brosius at third base and continue the "dynasty" for years to come with Jeter, Soriano and Nick Johnson. Well, Jeter is batting around .250, Johnson is sharing time with Giambi, Soriano can't field and Henson is struggling to get by in AAA. This is why people hate the Y*nkees. Henson is making $2 million this year and will be making $12 million more in the next 3 years. No other club in baseball would be as spend-crazy as this. Albert Pujols and Dontrelle Willis are making less than $500K and look at their contributions to their teams!. Anyway, here's a Henson story I found that inspired this rant.

Jays lost, A's won, Y*nks were idle again. Think about it. Had the Sox swept Tampa, which we easily could've done, we'd be 2 Games Behind New York instead of 4. The only way we leave the Bronx in first place Monday night is if we sweep. For some reason, I doubt that will happen.

D-Lowe vs. D-Wells tomorrow afternoon at 4 at Y*nkee Stadium. We need to win 3 to stay alive in the division.

If you're gonna bet any money on European soccer next year, here are my predictions:

1. Chelsea will win the English Premeir League, Arsenal will win the FA Cup
2. Real Madrid will win the Spanish Liga Primera and the UEFA Champions' League over Bayern Munich.
3. Bayern Munich will win the German Bundesliga and the German Cup
4. Germany will win Euro 2004. Goals by Klose and Nueville and a clean sheat from Oliver Kahn will give Der Deutschlanders the win

Post #40

Tuesday, July 01, 2003


Lot's of talk surrounding the closer position these days. Ever since Lyon blew his first Save Saturday night. It's time for my thoughts on this shiat. Now, there is news that BH Kim is moving to the pen to be the closer. And when Mendoza returns, he could be moved into the rotation. What shocks me is that RS Nation isn't exploding in rage about this move? Mendoza a starter? What's worse, it looks like he could make his 1st start against the first place Y*nkees! WOW! I wouldn't mind seeing Mendoza as a starter against teams like Tampa or even Baltimore, but to throw him into the Bronx after striking out high school and college kids? C'mon!

First of all. Why do the Sox need a closer? We have the offense to crush the bad teams. And Lyon has gone 9 for 10 in Save Opportunities. That is as good as a percentage as you're gonna get, folks. Smoltz, and Gagne have 92% and 95%, respectively. Now, 10 Opportunities is a very small sample, but that's all we have. Some may say that Lyon hasn't made any clutch Saves, but how many clutch Saves does a closer make in a year? I'd say the number varies from 5 to 10. So guys like Nenn, Hoffman, and Rivera get millions of dollars to come in for 50-60 innings a year and maybe 10 of those are so-called "clutch" innings. They blow 15% of their saves but are still considered "dependable" or "clutch." Beyond Gagne and Smoltz, and the Rivera of years past, I'd say that all closers are overrated and not all that good.

I'd also say that Lyon can close as well as BH Kim. But, BH Kim can start much better than Lyon. But which is more important? Is Kim's 6-9 innings of starting more important than his inning of closing? We've got half of the season left so are Kim's 30 innings as a closer as hlepful to the team as 100 as a starter? The math is simple. People may say that those 30 innings are the toughest innings to pitch. I disagree. I think every inning is equally tough until the score is determined. An Inning Pitched with a tied game or a one run lead or a one run deficit is probably the toughest inning. However, closers rarely come in when the team is tied or behind. And how many more times from innings 1-8 is the game a tied game or is the game a one-run game? Let's say these zero to one run innings come about every one out of three innings. That would mean Kim would be pitching in 33 "tough" innings as a starter and 10 as a closer. Which is a greater contribution to the team?

I asked my friend Ben to come up with some arguments for Kim being the closer. Here's what he came up with:

"we don't have anything to trade for another closer and if we did it wouldn't be worth it cause Kim is fine, Lyon is unproven as a closer up until this season and didn't look to great over the weekend"

We cna trade for Benitez, who I don't want, or Tom Gordon with ease. Gordon is a proven closer and would cost us very little in terms of prospects and added salary. It's true Lyon had a Blown Save and struggled at first Sunday evening, but Kim has given up some pretty big homeruns in big situations. Remember the 2001 World Series. Kim didn't exactly prove to be all that dependable or clutch, did he?

"Fossum has no place on this list anyways, I don't know why he should even be considered for the job"

Why should Fossum be considered a potential closer? He's got two pitches, and hitters have an easy time hitting him each time he pitches through the lineup. Perfect closer material.

"the closer pitches 4 or 5 days of the week as opposed to 1 or 2 like the starter"

That would equate to 131 appearances. That's way more than any closer puts up today. Most closers pitch half that many times. And most of those times are with a 3 or 2 run lead or against shitty teams. The question isn't how many appearances a closer makes compared to a starter, it's the innings. It's simple math. Starters pitch thrice as many innings as closers.

"each of those innings he pitches are the toughest innings of the game, which is why you need someone dependable and reliable to come in and close it down in the 9th"

That's bullshit. It can be the toughest inning to pitch, but so can any other inning. Look at the 1st inning of Friday night's game. In one inning the game was over.

"Kim over his career with the D'backs has proven he can be that guy"

78% career save percentage. That means one in every eight Save Opps. is a Blown Save.

"and if you don't think the closer is important than look at how many games the Sox have lost over the last week as a result of having a shitty bullpen"

A shitty bullpen is one thing. That's seven different guys. If Kim were to be an old-school 3 inning closer, then the move would make sense, but I don't see how putting Mendoza in the rotation solves thist team's problems. The Sox are looking to do something and can't do it on the trade market.

"having a dependable closer at the end would give us timlin Lyon and Embree as setup guys"

I agree with that, but SPs are more important than RPs. Always have been, always will be.

"name me the last team you can remember that made the WS without a legitamate closer"

Name the last team to win the WS with guys like Burkett and Mendoza in the rotation.

"and we have starters who can fill in for Kim without losing many quality starts"

Ryan Rupe? Ramiro Mendoza? John Burkett? Casey Fossum? YUCK!

Peter Gammons' First half review. Included in this are his picks for the All-Star Game. Peter! Posada starting? No Bill Mueller? Anyhow, here's my ASG ballot:

2B-Bret Boone (SEA)
3B-Bill Mueller
OF-Manny, Rocco Baldelli (TB), Vernon Wells (TOR)
DH-David Ortiz

C-Mike Lieberthal (PHI)
1B-Richie Sexson (MIL)
2B-Jeff Kent (HOU)
3B-Mike Lowell (FLA)
SS-Edgar Renteria (StL)
OF-Albert Pujols (StL), Barry Bonds (SFG), Vlad Guerrero (MON)

Y*nkees won, Jays lost, A's lost.

Another former Soxer nearly threw a no-no. Jamie Moyer went 6 2/3 before relenting a hit.

Post #39

Monday, June 30, 2003


All you gotta know about this game is this: 1 out in the bottom of the 3rd inning. Derek Jeter hits a single. Alfonso Soriano, who was on first, attempts to make it to third. He is tagged before reaching the bag but is called "safe" by the third base umpire, one Tim Timmons. So instead of a man on second and two outs, there's runners on second and third with one out. So, with one out, Jason Giambi hits a 3 run homerun. Mondesi records an out, the second of the inning, but should have been the third out. Then, Matsui and Posada go back-to-back with solo homeruns. So the Y*nkees win 5-3. But they should have lost 3-2. Just another example of the boys in blue helping the Empire in midnight blue. What the hell kind of color is that anyway? Midnight blue is for people thinking that only black heats up in the sun, not blue.

Anyway, here's the BOX SCORE


Oh yeah, I'm sick of hearing about the Knicks draft picks. No-one outside of Manhattan cares! They're all Nets fans anyway!

Post #38

Sunday, June 29, 2003


Florida Marlins 25
Boston Red Sox 45

Sox advance to the elimination stage on aggregate goals. (bad soccer joke)

Does anybody know who that hot blonde was sitting behind home plate? She had a pink shirt on. Sie war sehr nett! Eine Schlampe!

The Man of the Game is "Honest" Gabe Kapler with his 2 homeruns. One of them hit some lady in the first row of the Monster Seats. She was okay, unfortunately, and got a "Jawnny Damon basebawl" Kapler's been a great pickup. See ya later Giambi! Here are the MOTG standings:

1. Nomar-4
2. Millar-3
3. Nixon-2
4. Kapler, Mueller, Burkett, Sanchez, Rupe, Lyon, J. Crede (CWS), E. Loiza (CWS), JD Drew (StL), B. Myers (PHI), J. Pierre (FLA)-1

I like seeing Kapler in he #29 jersey. Much better than Hillenbrand. Fuck Hillenbrand. Speaking of which, he was just activated by the D-Bax.

Speaking of former Sox. Tomo Ohka nearly got a n0-hitter vs. the Jays. He lost the no-no but won the game. Y*nks play against the M.E.T.S. (Must End The Season) tonight.

Overreaction from Little and the boys? BH Kim to pen? and Little hinting at bullpen changes. I don't think Kim should close. I think we need the starter. I don't put my faith in Burkett or Mendoza or Fossum. I'd rather have Fossum close. I think he's perfect for the closer position. Here's why:

1. Fossum only has two pitches, making him perfect for the bullpen and a very questionable starter.
2. He's got the over powering fastball and the off-balancing curveball to get guys out.
3. He's a lefty which means it's easier for him to get guys like Giambi out.

I'll elaborate more on closing tomorrow as it is an off-day for the Sox.

Chad Fox was activated off the DL. I love that expression "activated" as if he were a robot or something. "This is Chad Fox 2000, I am willing to pitch now. Error. Malfunction. Homerun" Rudy Seanez got designated for assigment which means he's gone. (Thank fucking God!) Ramiro Mendoza pitched 5 scoreless innings in A Sarasota against a bunch of recent high schoolers and college grads. That's all for now.

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